Hybrid 'super mosquito' resistant to insecticide-treated bed nets

Interbreeding of two malaria mosquito species in the West African country of Mali has resulted in a "super mosquito" hybrid that's resistant to insecticide-treated bed nets.

"It's 'super' with respect to its ability to survive exposure to the insecticides on treated bed nets," said medical entomologist Gregory Lanzaro of UC Davis, who led the research team.

The research, published Jan. 6 in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, "provides convincing evidence indicating that a man-made change in the environment -- the introduction of insecticides -- has altered the evolutionary relationship between two species, in this case a breakdown in the reproductive isolation that separates them," said Lanzaro, who is director of the Vector Genetics Laboratory and professor in the Department of Pathology, Microbiology and Immunology in the School of Veterinary Medicine.

"What we provide in this new paper is an example of one unusual mechanism that has promoted the rapid evolution of insecticide resistance in one of the major malaria mosquito species."

Anopheles gambiae, a major malaria vector, is interbreeding with isolated pockets of another malaria mosquito, A. coluzzii. Entomologists initially considered them as the "M and S forms" of Anopheles gambiae. They are now recognized as separate species.

The insecticide resistance came as no surprise. "Growing resistance has been observed for some time," Lanzaro said. "Recently it has reached a level at some localities in Africa where it is resulting in the failure of the nets to provide meaningful control, and it is my opinion that this will increase."

Lanzaro credits insecticide-treated nets with saving many thousands, probably tens of thousands of lives in Mali alone. The World Health Organization's World Malaria Report indicates that deaths from malaria worldwide have decreased by 47 percent since 2000. Much of that is attributed to the insecticide-treated bed nets.

However, it was just a matter of time for insecticide resistance to emerge, medical entomologists and epidemiologist agree. Now there's "an urgent need to develop new and effective malaria vector control strategies," Lanzaro said. A number of new strategies are in development, including new insecticides, biological agents -- including mosquito-killing bacteria and fungi -- and genetic manipulation of mosquitoes aimed at either killing them or altering their ability to transmit the malaria parasite.

First author on the paper is Laura Norris, a postdoctoral scholar in the UC Davis Department of Entomology and Nematology who was supported by a National Institutes of Health training grant awarded to Lanzaro. She has since accepted a position with the President's Malaria Initiative in Washington, D.C.

Other co-authors include, at UC Davis, Anthony Cornel, Yoosook Lee, Bradley Main and Travis Collier; and Abdrahamane Fofana of the Malaria Research and Training Center at the University of Bamako, Mali. Three grants from the National Institutes of Health funded the research.

Lanzaro has researched mosquitos in Mali for 24 years with Cornel, who is an associate professor in the UC Davis Department of Entomology and Nematology and headquartered at the UC Kearney Agriculture and Research Center, Parlier. Both are graduate student advisors in the department, training medical entomologists of tomorrow.

Story Source:

The above story is based on materials provided by University of California - Davis . The original article was written by Andy Fell. Note: Materials may be edited for content and length.

The Hulk Smashes Even More in New Avengers: Age of Ultron Trailer

The new Avengers: Age of Ultron trailer can be summed up in this one quote from Scarlett Johansson’s Black Widow: “Oh boy…”

Following a much moodier teaser in which Ultron reminded our fearless heroes that he was no one’s puppet, this latest clip—which premiered during tonight’s college championship football game between Ohio State University and the University of Oregon—goes right for the “stuff blowing up” jugular. To wit, there’s a lot more of Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) facing off with Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) in the Hulkbuster suit. Damn, this thing looks good (and you know that Hulk vs. Iron Man thing is just the appetizer for the epic finale in this flick).

The new trailer, which you can watch above, also has plenty of Thor (Chris Hemsworth), Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner), and Ultron (voiced by James Spader). Avengers: Age of Ultron smashes into theaters May 1.

23andMe Teams With Big Pharma to Find Treatments Hidden in Our DNA

Getty Images

23andMe, the personal genetics startup backed by Facebook billionaire Yuri Milner and Google Ventures, has been plagued by obstacles on its mission to become the world’s repository for human genetic information—including a drawn-out standoff with the U.S. Food and Drug Administration. But the company is persevering.

On Monday, 23andMe announced it is sharing (anonymously) the DNA data it has collected on 650,000 individuals with pharmaceutical giant Pfizer. Sharing resources, the companies say, will help them figure out new ways to treat disease and to design clinical trials.

The terms of the deal were not disclosed publicly, but any good news is a step forward for the beleaguered startup. Since it launched in 2007, the Silicon Valley startup has built its business on analyzing DNA extracted from customers’ saliva to let them learn more about their ancestry, inherited traits, and risk factors for medical conditions. About 800,000 customers have signed up for 23andMe’s services over seven years, with two-thirds of them giving consent to let their personal test data be used in research.

Researchers hope to use 23andMe’s trove of genetic data to decipher connections between DNA and disease.

During those years, the company endured its share of controversy, culminating in a late-2013 clash with the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, which claimed 23andMe was in effect marketing a medical device without proper approvals. The FDA also contended the startup was slow in responding to agency inquiries, further souring their relationship.

The company dealt with the blow in part by selling its tests outside the U.S. And 23andMe CEO Anne Wojcicki recently told Bloomberg that the startup has been trying to repair its ties with the FDA. In May, the company began focusing its efforts on a new test limited to detecting a single genetic disorder, called Bloom syndrome, she said. The hope, according to Wojcicki, is that proceedings will move faster once this test is approved by the agency.

Valuable Data

In the meantime, 23andMe appears to have figured out how to capitalize on the trove of personal test data it has already acquired. The anonymized collection of gene scans represents a huge sample of genetic profiles from which researchers hope to decipher connections between DNA and disease. The data appears to be valuable enough that Pfizer isn’t the only big pharma company looking to dig further. Last week, according to a Forbes , 23andMe inked a deal with Genentech worth $10 million up front, and up to $50 million if further milestones are reached.

With two big names already on their roster of clients, it’s likely that other major pharmaceutical companies will follow suit in hopes of leveling the competitive playing field. And in fact 23andMe has said it would announce a total of 10 similar deals with drugmakers and biotechnology companies this year. It’s also likely, though, that collaborating with so many big pharmaceutical companies will bring renewed scrutiny from privacy advocates who have criticized the collection of so much highly personal data into one place.

But controversy is nothing new to 23andMe, and as its tests sit on the shelf, it’s understandable the company would look to capitalize on one of its most valuable assets. Leveraging its data has always been part of 23andMe’s business plan. If pharmaceutical companies are able to sift that data and uncover new treatments, that data could come to benefit us all.

Our Meticulous Google Hangout Recap of the Golden Globes

Best Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture (Presented by Jennifer Aniston and Benedict Cumberbatch)

Rubin: Taniston.

Watercutter: CUMBERBATCH

Rubin: “She got 4 4s”—my wife, with the Friends deep cut

Crucchiola: Taniston!

LOLOL

Rubin: Someone counted Mississippily!

Crucchiola: I think that was my favorite throw to an awards present ever.

Rubin: Ethan Hawke has turned into Young Bill Paxton.

Crucchiola: Early advantage WHIPLASH!

Watercutter: And the band gets to play jazz!

Rubin: “And the award goes to…JK Simmons! No, wait, sorry, that should have been ‘J/K, it goes to Mark Ruffalo.”

Rubin: I kinda hoped he’d accept in character as Cave Johnson from Portal 2.

Crucchiola: Let’s never forget Oz.

Rubin: Or as the mogul from Party Down.

Watercutter: Miles Teller is Robin?!

Rubin: Always struck me as more of a Nightwing.

Watercutter: “He inspired me every day to want to scream at him and hit him in the face.” – JK Simmons on Miles “Boy Wonder” Teller

Crucchiola: It’s nice to see JK getting this spotlight. He’s fantastic.

Rubin: Lorne Michaels looking straight St. Tropez at the Simmons table. How did that happen?

Best Supporting Actress in a Series, Miniseries, or TV Movie (Presented By the Leads of Fifty Shades of Grey)

Crucchiola: There is ALREADY negative chemistry between Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan!

Rubin: “And, in one more stab at making you care about Fifty Shades of Grey…”

Rubin: Weird that Michelle Monaghan didn’t win for a role she inhabited for approximately 17 seconds an episode.

Watercutter: Joanne Froggatt wins.

Watercutter: Downton Domination

Crucchiola: Cathy Bates losing is not an acceptable answer.

“This is the most shocking moment of my life” is not anything a Downton winner can say.

Kehe: Are we always to be made uncomfortable by the long awkward walk from table to stage?

Rubin: It gets staggerier as the night goes on.

Watercutter: I’m so glad that it appears Jessica Chastain at the front table.

That means she’ll always be there as we await people walking to stage.

Crucchiola: I would deliver my whole speech to her.

And just thank her. For everything.

Kehe: First commercial break. Impressions?

Rubin: No one told me that live-chatting awards show meant having to sit through commercials. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?

So far so meh?

Watercutter: The opening bit was nice.

Crucchiola: I liked the duo-logue.

Watercutter: And I’ll never be mad JK Simmons won something.

Crucchiola: Oh but now we get to watch coming attractions commercials!

Watercutter: Blackhat!

Rubin: H4CK3RZ WITH GUNS

Kehe: /shirtless Chris Hemsworth

Crucchiola: YES, PLEASE

Rubin: h4xth0r

Damn, wish I had thought of that one first.

Watercutter: Yes, Peter, yessss!

Best TV Miniseries or Movie (Presented by Jennifer Lopez and Jeremy Renner)

Rubin: Clumsy joke #Million: “It’s J-Locut and Huh-Guy!”

Kehe: What part of JLo’s dress did she rip off for her earrings?

Rubin: All of it, I think.

Crucchiola: Good win for FX with Fargo.

Kehe: FARGO!

Rubin: Dark horse!

Crucchiola: I support Martin Freeman’s endeavors.

Rubin: As do I, I just wish I liked the show more.

Crucchiola: The just-before-they-hit-the-stage cam is uncomfortable.

Rubin: Wallace Shawn is looking younger than ever!

Crucchiola: “We’re gonna do it again” was very defiant.

Like someone is trying to STOP FARGO.

Rubin: Maybe just global warming.

Best Actor in a TV Miniseries or Movie

Crucchiola: Ohhhhh good category!

Woody vs. Matthew!

Rubin: I think McConnaughey’s been here since last year

Watercutter: Ok, True Detective will win SOMETHING here, right?

Crucchiola: THE WALLACE SHAWN BABY!!!

I’m going for Woody!!

FARGO DOUBLE UPSET!

Watercutter: Billy Bob Thornton!

Kehe: Back to back FARGOS.

Rubin: Jeremy Renner’s chemistry with J-Lo’s breasts is also terrible.

Watercutter: Billy Bob almost just did finger guns.

Kehe: “Fargo” hereinafter my word for “upset.”

Rubin: Good, because I’m Fargo about this acceptance speech.

Crucchiola: Billy rocking the paisley-esque print shirt, since forever.

Watercutter: “I’m just gonna say ‘thank you.'”—Thanks for that, Billy Bob.

Naomi Watts Takes the Stage

Crucchiola: WOW. YES NAOMI.

Rubin: Iced Out Herpetologist.

Watercutter: Is she wearing a snake made of diamonds?

Rubin: That’s what she’s doing!

Crucchiola: I think Birdman‘s got comedy/musical and Boyhood has drama.

Neither of those are interesting thoughts, but still.

Kehe: Has any favorite won so far? Are there even favorites?

Crucchiola: Fair point, Jason.

No one has BUZZ this year.

And does that mean nothing was good or that there was TOO much good?

Watercutter: Nothing is on an unstoppable run.

Crucchiola: In a year where Box Office was down year over year from 2013.

Watercutter: … but when we have more prestige TV than ever.

Crucchiola: Also, Page Six tweets that Entourage is filming AT the Globes tonight… Gross?

Watercutter: Margaret Cho! (Right?)

Rubin: Margaret Cho bout to get HACKED, y’all.

Crucchiola: Margaret Cho was born to do this.

Watercutter: C-Batch photobomb!

Benedict has been perfecting that move for a while now.

Crucchiola: Meryl gives the standing O for freedom of speech chat!

Audience follows!

Meryl is their guide. And they listen.

Kehe: We wouldn’t be doing this recap right now if it weren’t for Alan Turing—gay grandfather of WIRED magazine.

Lead Actress in a TV Comedy or Musical (Presented by Kerry Washington and Bryan Cranston)

Crucchiola: Do we think Cranston will win this year just because we don’t know what else to do?

THE CW ACTRESS WON?!?!?!

Watercutter: Jane the Virgin surprise!

Rubin: Jane the Virgin going FARGO on these fools.

Crucchiola: Whoooaaaaaaa!!!!!!

This will be, no matter what, the biggest upset of the night.

Rubin: I hope she gives an immaculate acceptance.

Crucchiola: OK, not that this girl doesn’t deserve it—I haven’t watched Jane the Virgin—but is the HFPA trolling?

Rubin: Kerry Washington and Bryan Cranston have no idea who Gina Rodriguez is.

Crucchiola: They just downed Netflix, HBO and Showtime

Watercutter: OK, that speech *was* great.

Kehe: Idk about immaculate but I was moved.

Crucchiola: Bless her little surprised heart.

Kehe: Suddenly I want Jane the Virgin to win everything since we’re clearly living in an alternate reality.

Best TV Comedy or Musical

Crucchiola: TRANSPARENT!

Watercutter: TRANSPARENT

Rubin: TRANSPARENT

Crucchiola: That whole category (best comedy series) was all women and minorities. Besides Silicon Valley.

Rubin: That’s what I was about to say!

Kehe: Meh—was I the ONLY person who found that show depressing?

Rubin: It was depressing and more.

Rubin: Jill Soloway: a deserver of Everything.

Crucchiola: 2014 REproves it was the biggest year in the history of trans discourse.

Watercutter: Alcorn dedication = my heart squeezes.

Rubin: Also shouting out her “mapa” is huge.

Crucchiola: Nothing is predictable.

I have no idea what’s going to happen!

Kehe: “To love” – absolutely. But none of those characters were particularly lovable.

Watercutter: I tend to enjoy flawed characters.

For those who want background on that Leelah Alcorn bit, here.

Kehe: I NEVER recognize Sienna Miller.

Apparently she was in Foxcatcher.

Best Original Score in a Motion Picture

Crucchiola: What TWIST will score deploy??

Watercutter: First win for Theory of Everything!

Kehe: Iceland! Discovered on some obscure Dutch music blog, no doubt.

Best Original Song in a Motion Picture (Presented by Prince)

Crucchiola: PRINCE?!?!?!?

THAT SWAGGER!

Kehe: The Hollywood Foreign Press obviously voted per the recs of the Dutch music bloggers.

Watercutter: Louis CK is so down for PRINCE right now.

Crucchiola: Oh, his voice.

It’s like slow rolling honey.

Rubin: I think I just got pregnant.

Crucchiola: Second that.

Kehe: Sia wrote a song for Annie?!

Crucchiola: I want original song to be Lorde!

Rubin: Just went back to see Allison Janney lose her shit over Prince.

Well worth it.

Crucchiola: Damn. We just got cheated out of a Lorde speech.

In her smart pants suit.

Watercutter: And a moment between Lorde and Prince.

Rubin: Chrissy Teigen’s husband seems very nice.

Crucchiola: Common can’t turn off his poet.

Rubin: And the giant humanoid cat who is Common gets a nice introduction to confused viewers!

Damn, Common, can John Legend get a word in?

Someone please GIF Chrissy Teigen’s face.

She looked stricken.

Watercutter: Right? She kinda forgot she was at a televised show there for a minute.

Kehe: Oprah’s quivering lower lip was basically me during Selma. I cried poetically for two hours.

Crucchiola: I don’t think I was ever not crying for Selma.

Just passive/active crying back and forth for two hours.

Watercutter: I only stopped crying during Selma once I was fully dehydrated.

Crucchiola: Hahahaha

So does Kat Dennings

Crucchiola: Oh NO

Watercutter:

Rubin: Oh noooo.

Best Supporting Actor in Series, Miniseries, or TV Movie (Presented by Katie Holmes and Seth Meyers)

Crucchiola: Aww Katie Holmes is here!

I like when she’s busy.

Rubin: I had no idea she was this tall

Kehe: This is the most she’s worked in a while.

Rubin: Or that Seth Meyers is a wee child.

Watercutter: BOMER

Kehe: Um, I think I’d like to see a Seth Meyer-Katie Holmes Weekend Update?

Watercutter: Alan Cumming in khaki.

Rubin: Alan Cumming goes Full Ecru!

Crucchiola: NORMAL HEART!

Kehe: YAY NORMAL HEART.

Crucchiola: MATT BOMER

This is probably why he didn’t do Fifty Shades.

Watercutter: Everyone should take note of Bomer’s suit.

Kehe: OK. This is the most progressive Globes ever.

Crucchiola: It’s STAGGERING.

Almost suspiciously progressive.

Rubin: They have three kids?

Watercutter: … And now I’m crying over The Normal Heart all over again.

Kehe: Humanity has miraculously leapt forward, like, a good generation.

Rubin: Keep in mind it’s the foreign press.

Crucchiola: On the heals of a distressing year.

That’s nice to see.

Rubin: Humanity is Huge in Europe.

Clive Owen Presents Theory of Everything

Watercutter: I’ve watched so much Knick this year I’m just presuming Clive Owen is high on coke right now.

Rubin: Friend of WIRED Eddie Redmayne!

Crucchiola: Hey Eddie!

Miss you!

Watercutter: Eddie!

Best Lead Actress in a Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical (Presented By Ricky Gervais)

Rubin: Did not miss you, Ricky.

Crucchiola: Ricky says “celebrity” like he ISN’T one.

Kehe: “Streep”—not enough people call her that.

Crucchiola: Amy Adams!

Well, that’s nice!

Watercutter: Amy just said on the red carpet she expected to not win.

WRONG AMY.

Crucchiola: The Globes love Amy.

Rubin: Hey, remember when she and Isla Fisher were the same person?

Crucchiola: So far the Oscars love her less.

Which makes me sad.

Rubin: And then Amy Adams started winning everything?

Kehe: I think we’ll need to watch the 8 p.m. broadcast because all the winners will surely be different.

Rubin: And now Isla Fisher just sits somewhere and has to act amused by Sasha Baron Cohen?

Watercutter: LOL

Crucchiola: Hahahahaha Jason you’re SO right!

Men and straight people and white people will win all of them in the 8 p.m. telecast

Watercutter: Everyone Loves Christoph!

Crucchiola: I believe Amy was genuinely surprised just now.

Crucchiola: … Where is Shailene Woodley??

Will she presenting the Mother Gaia award in this celebration of women at the Golden Globes??

Rubin: I was sure she’d pop up when the actress from Jane Divergent won for best actress.

…I’ll see myself out

Kehe: No!

That was my only LOL of the night

Watercutter:

Thanks, Internet.

Rubin: That was really a tremendous photobomb.

Crucchiola: It’s so perfect it looks fake.

Watercutter: He’s great at it.

Kehe: It’s so cartoony. Is there a trampoline?

Crucchiola: Like, digitally manipulated.

Rubin: SPROING

Best Animated Feature (Presented by Salma Hayek and Kevin Hart)

Watercutter: Hey, it’s Everly!

Crucchiola: Lil’ Kev!

Rubin: … and Keverly!

Crucchiola:

Hahahahaha!

Watercutter: I Hart Keverly.

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Rubin: HEYOOOO.

Watercutter: … now I’ll show myself out.

Crucchiola: It was nice of Salma to stand up there and be Kevin Hart’s audience member.

Gruyere?

Is that what she said?

Greer!

Greer Grammer!

Rubin: Judy Gruyere.

Crucchiola: “You’re the dude of the moment”—Salma

Watercutter: Really?

Kehe: Not Lego Movies?!

Crucchiola: WHAT THE HELL?!?!

Rubin: Big Hero 6 gets Fargoed by HTTYD2!

On the plus side, I would very much like this guy [How to Train Your Dragon 2 director Dean DeBlois, right] to rescue me from a burning building.

Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture (Presented by Jared Leto)

Watercutter: Marry Me, Meryl.

I am so bewitched.

Rubin: How to train your preciousness, Jared Leto.

OK, best supporting actress, motion picture.

Watercutter: I can’t choose in this category. I can’t.

Kehe: C’mon, Patricia.

Rubin: Jared Leto looks like a soda jerk.

Kehe: YES THANK YOU.

Crucchiola: Boyhood strikes.

Watercutter: Patricia Arquette—so deserved!

Crucchiola: I get it.

And I’m happy about it.

But I still can’t be moved away from Jessica Chastain.

Kehe: She’s trembling. I love her.

Kehe: I’d like her to win the Oscar. I thought she was the best part of Boyhood.

Watercutter: She was.

Kehe: She evolved as both a character and actress before our eyes.

Crucchiola:

Kehe: I want fingers like that.

They’re murder weapons.

Crucchiola: For .

Crucchiola: FINALLY more Tina and Amy!

Rubin: Gotta say, not as sure about this Interview

bit.

Best Screenplay (Presented by Kristen Wiig and Bill Hader)

Watercutter: The Skeleton Twins!

Rubin: Skeleton twinz!

Crucchiola: Yay the Skeleton Twins!

Kehe: Nothing’s gonna stop them now.

Watercutter: I want him to slip into Stefon for just a second. “It’s that thing, where a bunch of street punks act out Terminator on mescaline…”

Crucchiola:

Rubin: I want this to keep going.

Watercutter: I wish I could “heart” this presentation.

Rubin: Screenplay bets?

Crucchiola: Birdman?

I’d be real happy with Gone Girl.

Rubin: Boyhood or Imitation Game.

Kehe: Betting is futile.

Watercutter: Birdman. Though I love Imitation Game.

Rubin: Birdman!

Crucchiola: BIRDMAN ATTACKS

Rubin: Wow. That’s crazy.

Watercutter: All 50 writers get on stage!

Rubin: Not in a bad way!

And 12 birds!

Those guys seem like a fun night out.

Watercutter:“He’s a badass!”—Jack Black on Richard Linklater

Best Lead Actor in a TV Comedy (Presented by Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin)

Crucchiola: JANE FONDA LOOKS THE BEST.

Rubin: Well, if it isn’t HANOI JANE.

Kehe: Hahahaha.

Watercutter: Jesus Jane Fonda

Crucchiola: ONE TRUE PAIRING

“I thought you were just high that day.”

Kehe: I WAS JUST GONNA SAY: they’re definitely both stoned.

Crucchiola: “Well, two things can be true.”

Someone get Jane a panini!

Watercutter: These two are crushing it.

Crucchiola: Well, I think next year’s hosts were just christened.

Rubin: They just called House of Lies “House of Cards.”

Kehe: Again, stoned.

Crucchiola: They’re drunk.

Rubin: Jeffrey Tambor!

Kehe: I’m looking forward to this acceptance speech.

Crucchiola: The male contenders category was just won by the person playing a trans woman.

The progressiveness builds!!

Rubin: “And that is why you ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE.”

Crucchiola: HA!

Crucchiola: “This is big. This is much bigger than me.”

You go, Jeffrey!

Kehe: I’ve only had one glass of wine but I feel drunk on progress.

Watercutter: “To Amazon, my new best friend.”

Dedication to the transgender community—YES.

Kehe: “Thank you for your patience.” That’s it, guys.

Crucchiola: “Thank you for letting us be a part of the change.”

Watercutter: “Thank you for letting us be a part of the change.”

Rubin: “Thank you for letting us be a part of the change” is an enduring quote.

Kehe: I need to excuse myself.

Watercutter: Jinx

Kehe: It’s a night for tears. This is really legitimizing the Hollywood Foreign Press for me.

Best Foreign Film (Presented by Lupita Nyong’o and Colin Farrell)

Crucchiola: YAY LUPITA!

I’ve missed her!

Kehe: It’s kinda a shame we had to endure Cosby and Interview jokes.

Rubin: Colin Farrell has escaped from a Zane Grey book cover

Kehe: I love Lupita’s glasses!

Rubin: Her brother is somewhere fumbling around myopically.

Best Actress in a TV Miniseries or Movie (Presented by Kate Beckinsale and Adrien Brody)

Crucchiola: I just heard Kate Beckinsale is the star of “The Disappointment’s Room.”

That can’t be right

LET IT BE LANGE!

Rubin: I think it’s “The Disappointment Shroom.”

Crucchiola: Huh.

The Honorable Woman.

Kehe: Another Fargo—except Fargo woman didn’t win.

Crucchiola: The inability to predict just KEEPS ON BUILDING.

Watercutter: I want to know what Maggie and Jake Gyllenhaal talk about when they have dinner.

Kehe: Their unusual bone structure, for sure.

Rubin: “So which one of us looks like Buzz Lightyear and which looks like a cabbage-leaf baby?”

Crucchiola: LOLOLOL

Maggie is so eloquent.

Rubin: Maggie Gyllenhaal: Turned On By Evolution!

(Maxim.com’s headline tomorrow)

Kehe: Her husband is a lover of complicated women. How evolutionary!

Rubin: She’s not just a winner, she’s a DAR-winner!

Kehe: Someone get this girl a KALE SALAD.

Rubin: (I mean she’s a member of the Daughters of the American Revolution.)

Crucchiola: Do you guys think Gina Rodriguez is still alive?

Watercutter: Tina’s Tux Just Won

Best TV Drama (Presented by Paul Rudd and Adam Levine)

Rubin: Paul Rudd and an oil slick currently on stage.

Watercutter: Sorry … now I’m writing in headlines for some reason.

Crucchiola: The Affair wins.

It’s opposite day!

Rubin:You Won’t Believe What Happened When Tina Fey Wore a Tux

Kehe: Was Affair supposed to win? Because the cameraman definitely fell over.

Crucchiola: No one tonight was supposed to win.

Kehe: Except HUMANITY.

Watercutter: You can’t win for something called The Affair and forget to thank your husband.

Kehe: Or can you?

Presentation for Pride

Watercutter: Gays!

Rubin: So now we know that Pride is a lock.

Crucchiola: I’m calling it now

Pride is winning this category.

Rubin: Any other night, not a chance.

Rubin: Tonight? Double rainbows for everyone.

Best Lead Actor in a TV Drama

Crucchiola: If Kevin Spacey wins Kate Mara can just be the trophy he holds in his hands.

Rubin: Francis Underwood with the win!

Watercutter: Kate is so happy for him!

Crucchiola: For a BISEXUAL POLITICIAN!

Watercutter: Never put down the drink, Kevin!

Rubin: He didn’t win a golden globe until he sexed a dude.

ON SCREEN

Watercutter: With his on-screen wife!

Rubin: Ben Foster is looking menacing.

Kehe: What was Kevin Spacey talking about? I…spaced.

Rubin: Stanley Kramer?

Watercutter: If Kevin Spacey gets any better I may not be able to handle it.

Rubin: Or nondairy creamer?

Crucchiola: This ideas as an abused alien commercial makes me really sad.

Rubin: “GE: We’ll Jim Henson the shit outta your ideas.”

Crucchiola: I hope your wife loved that one.

Rubin: We were both too busy screaming in terror at the idea.

Kehe: What about [Rubin’s dog] Crosby?

Rubin: If it’s not a back issue of Spy, he doesn’t have time for it.

Crucchiola: What a hipster.

Rubin: He rode here on a bike made out of antique tuba parts!

Watercutter: He wants you to switch over to Girls doesn’t he?

Crucchiola: That may have been the most on-point joke of the evening.

Kehe: HAHA.

Peter, you can write the Globes next year.

Crucchiola: That was a Tina/Amy joke.

Crucchiola: So, can Tina and Amy write the jokes again?

WHERE are they?!

George Clooney Gets the Cecil B. DeMille Award (Presented by Julianna Margulies and Don Cheadle)

Watercutter: We’re all FoGs!

Friends of George.

Rubin: Frugals of Gourmet

Crucchiola: I’m so jealous of Amal Alamuddin’s husband.

Kehe: Tribute to George opens with view of Earth from space: because he’s god.

Rubin: Why does this George Clooney reel feature no Facts of Life or Roseanne clips?

Crucchiola: That’s a failure.

Rubin: Cecil B. DeFEAT

Rubin: Obligatory Leatherheads moment.

THERE’S my Out of Sight clip.

Watercutter: Jules!

Kehe: He calls her “Jules.”

Crucchiola: When he said Jules and Don she was VISIBLY overwhelmed.

That was the greatest moment of her life.

We should all respect that the Clooney-sance predated the McConaissance.

This guy had a mullet in Rosanne.

Watercutter: George has on a “Je Suis Charlie” button on.

Crucchiola: And only started making consistent credibility pictures after like 2000.

Watching George Clooney be bashful about Amal is the most endearing thing he’s ever done.

Watercutter: It’s impossible for this man to not be charming.

Crucchiola: I want him to call me Jules.

It’s not my name and I don’t care.

Watercutter: Side note: I want some SF theater programmer to make a Fifty Shades of Grey and Magic Mike XXL double bill.

Rubin: How many categories are left? I just had my second birthday since this started.

Best Director (Presented by Harrison Ford)

Crucchiola: Does Harrison have his earring in??

Check!

Rubin: He does!

Watercutter: Soon to be seen in Star Wars Something Or Another, Harrison Ford.

Crucchiola: OK, so Linklater for director is the only think that hasn’t surprised me.

Kehe: I imagined Richard Linklater very differently.

Crucchiola: Less dude-like?

Kehe: Yeah.

Rubin: Not like Owen Wilson with gravitas?

Crucchiola: He kind of SOUNDS like Owen Wilson

Oh… indeed Peter.

Best Lead Actress in a TV Drama (Presented by Anna Faris and Chris Pratt)

Crucchiola: Look at that TRIM man!

Chris Pratt!

Rubin: Glad Chris Pratt is still “from Parks and Rec…” and not “Marvel anabolic freakshow…”

Crucchiola: Claire can’t win.

It’s too easy.

Ruth Wilson!

Rubin: Viola Davis is 3000% better than anything else about that How To Get Away With Murder.

I didn’t know Luther’s Stalker had a real name!

Crucchiola: I’m glad Ruth Wilson won on the strength of her role in Luther alone.

Rubin: Resolved: we will all watch The Affair now.

Crucchiola: No one in the audience is laughing at her jokes.

Because they don’t know what she’s talking about.

Because they haven’t seen The Affair.

Watercutter: “Dom, your ass is something of great beauty.” Well, OK then!

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Kehe: In keeping with tonight’s theme:

Rubin: THERE we go.

Nancy McKeon approves.

Crucchiola: Well now we know WHY he got the honor.

He was EXPERIMENTING!

Watercutter: George Clooney: Original Lesbian

Crucchiola: GOL

Kehe: GOL. LOL.

Best Lead Actor in a Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical

Watercutter: Yes, Keaton! #MyBatman

Crucchiola: Man, Michael Keaton is SO awesome!

Kehe: Michael Keaton thanks HFPA for having a comedy category? Doesn’t the rest of the world disagree?

Crucchiola:

Rubin: Michael Keaton is in the third act of a Frank Capra movie right now.

Watercutter: Keaton’s number on the McCon-O-Meter right now is very high.

Rubin: Amy Poehler teared up a little, I think.

Watercutter: Again, Fey’s Tux Wins.

Rubin: Keaton got at least 400 millMcConaughheys.

Kehe: Oprah looks AWESOME. Gale agrees.

Gayle*

Rubin: Stedman is just happy to be here.

Crucchiola: He’s glad Gayle let him come.

Channing Tatum Presents Foxcatcher

Rubin: The Chan-Chan Man!

Speaking of Cecil B. DeBurnt.

Watercutter: Chan-Chan the Spray Tan Man

Rubin: My man is looking straight flame-broiled.

Watercutter: Still love him forever and a day.

Rubin: Charnel Taylun!

Best Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical

Crucchiola: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????

Rubin: Wes Blanderson

Watercutter: All together now … “Huh?”

Rubin:… at least it had Bill Murray in it?

Crucchiola:

Watercutter: I just don’t know how that beat Birdman.

Kehe: OK, so drama predictions? Lego Movie??

Best Lead Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Crucchiola: MORE JULIANNE.

Reese. REVERSE AGING.

Watercutter: YES

Crucchiola: Heeeyyyyyyyy STILL ALICE!!!!

Watercutter: JULIANNE!

Kehe: JULIANNA MOOOOOORE!

Crucchiola: Her dress suggests she is VERY surprised she won.

As it has NO mobility.

Rubin: Is that Osh Kosh B’Gosh?

Watercutter: I’m so glad Julianne was able to get some use out of Katniss’s Mockingjay dress.

Crucchiola: Please let this foreshadow her long-delayed Oscar win

Watercutter: Yes—this better put her high on the Oscar list.

Kehe: Her accrual of milliMcConaugheys begins.

Lead Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama

Crucchiola: EDDIE WON!!!!!

Rubin: WHOA

Kehe: NOOOOOOOO

Watercutter: Friend of WIRED Eddie Wins!

Crucchiola: THE WIRED ENDORESEMENT PAYS OFF!!!

Rubin: Nice work Mr. Redmayne!

Rubin:I am legitimately happy for this guy.

Crucchiola: Wondrous!

Rubin: His hands are shaking. Endearing.

Watercutter: So happy for him!

Crucchiola: Every woman at Wired is ready to enter a plural marriage with Eddie and Hannah.

Kehe: Uh, and every man.

Crucchiola: Fair.

Rubin: Sorry, saving myself for that giant dude who made How To Train Your Dragon 2.

Crucchiola: My apologies.

Crucchiola:

Crucchiola: Swoon-factor DEFINITELY matters in the race for milliMcConaugheys.

Best Motion Picture, Drama (Presented by Living Goddess Meryl Streep)

Watercutter: Marry Me, Meryl.

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Crucchiola: And now for your clinic in stage presence,

by Meryl Streep.

Watercutter:Really, really tough category.

Boyhood!

Crucchiola: I get it.

Kehe: Great.

Crucchiola: But I’m already bored by it.

Crucchiola: “Biggest leap in film history”?

Richard.

Watercutter: Ethan Hawke made sure to get his Meryl Moment right there.

Rubin: Cho with the signoff!

Watercutter: Someone GIF Amy with that glass, right now.

Rubin: Great Cho, everyone.

Not the worst Globes ever!

Watercutter: After all that sad they have to remind us that Parks and Rec is ending?

Kehe: Real winners: Naomi’s serpent necklace, Prince, Gayle, HFPA

Rubin: Seriously.

I’m going to agree with all of those.

Watercutter: Real Heroes: Tambor, Bomer, Jessica Chastain (for being Jessica Chastain).

Crucchiola: All right. Going forward to Oscars: Boyhood‘s to lose? Keaton? Moore?

Rubin: Indeed.

Watercutter: Gotta say, I’m a little bummed that there wasn’t more love for Selma, but that’s neither here nor there.

Kehe: Anything can/should happen. I almost don’t want to grant anyone frontrunner status.

One prediction I will make: Next year’s hosts will be Kristen Wiig and Bill Hader, with jokes by Peter Rubin.

Watercutter: My dream!

Kehe: You incepted the idea, and now I’m gonna campaign for it.

Watercutter: And with that, we look forward to next year!

G’nite y’all! I’m going to watch the repeat… Or at least the duo-logue.

How Lasers Will Help Us Make Planes Quieter and More Fuel-Efficient

DLR

Over the past century, the airplane has revolutionized the way we travel and do business, and made enormous technological advances. But modern jetliners burn gobs of fuel and are still loud, especially if you live near an airport flight path. So plane manufacturers (with extra encouragement from government regulators) are always on the lookout for ways to make their aircraft quieter and more efficient.

One way to save fuel and reduce noise is to land at lower speeds, which calls for a more detailed understanding of how air moves over plane wings. Normally, aircraft designers model airflows in computer simulations and in wind tunnels, because it’s difficult to track air moving over a wing at 400 MPH. Now, a German research team is finally getting that detail from in-flight measurements. And it’s doing it with lasers.

During two nighttime flights this week, a team at the German Aerospace Center (the country’s NASA equivalent) shot bright green lasers from the window of their test plane out onto the wing of their specially equipped Airbus 320 Advanced Technology Research Aircraft. The lasers (which are so bright, the pilots wear goggles) illuminate the water droplets moving across the wing, enough for high-speed cameras to capture the movement of the droplets airstream in real time.

By analyzing the images captured by the two high-speed cameras, the researchers can visualize real water droplets—and thus airflow—as they move over the wing. It’s a more accurate and realistic data set than what you get from a computer simulation, and better than past in-flight systems, which were attached to the wing itself, interfering with the airflow and only allowing for a measurements at a few points. One of the most useful aspects about this approach, called Particle Image Velocimetry, is that it allows scientists to compare real-world airflow with their simulations, to ensure that the computer models are accurate.

The team is focusing on analyzing the aircraft’s flight just before landing, when all the flaps are open to maximize lift at low air speeds. Thanks to custom software, the entire airflow around the wing can be visualized in three dimensions. “We want to acquire an understanding, in hitherto unachieved precision, of how the airflow behaves around the wings and flaps, and especially around the engine” during low-speed flight, says Ralf Rudnik, the scientist in charge of the High Lift In-Flight Validation Project.

Increasing lift allows planes to throttle back more, saving fuel and allowing for a quieter approach. That’s important for quality of life concerns for those living near airports, as well as airlines that want to save on fuel bills. If the research is successful, future aircraft designs could allow for a reduction in the minimum speed required on approach for landing. French airline manufacturer Airbus is involved in this research as well, and the FAA is approaching it from another angle, improving flight paths at airports in Houston to minimize throttle use on approach.

So if you live near an airport, these green lasers could make your life a little quieter in a decade or two.

The Hulk Smashes Even More in New Avengers: Age of Ultron Trailer

The new Avengers: Age of Ultron trailer can be summed up in this one quote from Scarlett Johansson’s Black Widow: “Oh boy…”

Following a much moodier teaser in which Ultron reminded our fearless heroes that he was no one’s puppet, this latest clip—which premiered during tonight’s college championship football game between Ohio State University and the University of Oregon—goes right for the “stuff blowing up” jugular. To wit, there’s a lot more of Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) facing off with Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) in the Hulkbuster suit. Damn, this thing looks good (and you know that Hulk vs. Iron Man thing is just the appetizer for the epic finale in this flick).

The new trailer, which you can watch above, also has plenty of Thor (Chris Hemsworth), Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner), and Ultron (voiced by James Spader). Avengers: Age of Ultron smashes into theaters May 1. Avengers: Age of Ultron smashes into theaters May 1.

23andMe Partners with Big Pharma to Find Treatments Hidden in Our Genes

23andMe, the personal genetics startup backed by Facebook billionaire Yuri Milner and Google Ventures, has been plagued by obstacles on its mission to become the world’s repository for human genetic information—including a drawn-out standoff with the U.S. Food and Drug Administration. But the company is persevering.

On Monday, 23andMe announced it is sharing (anonymously) the DNA data it has collected on 650,000 individuals with pharmaceutical giant Pfizer. Sharing resources, the companies say, will help them figure out new ways to treat disease and to design clinical trials.

The terms of the deal were not disclosed publicly, but any good news is a step forward for the beleaguered startup. Since it launched in 2007, the Silicon Valley startup has built its business on analyzing DNA extracted from customers’ saliva to let them learn more about their ancestry, inherited traits, and risk factors for medical conditions. About 800,000 customers have signed up for 23andMe’s services over seven years, with two-thirds of them giving consent to let their personal test data be used in research.

Researchers hope to use 23andMe’s trove of genetic data to decipher connections between DNA and disease.

During those years, the company endured its share of controversy, culminating in a late-2013 clash with the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, which claimed 23andMe was in effect marketing a medical device without proper approvals. The FDA also contended the startup was slow in responding to agency inquiries, further souring their relationship.

The company dealt with the blow in part by selling its tests outside the U.S. And 23andMe CEO Anne Wojcicki recently told Bloomberg that the startup has been trying to repair its ties with the FDA. In May, the company began focusing its efforts on a new test limited to detecting a single genetic disorder, called Bloom syndrome, she said. The hope, according to Wojcicki, is that proceedings will move faster once this test is approved by the agency.

Valuable Data

In the meantime, 23andMe appears to have figured out how to capitalize on the trove of personal test data it has already acquired. The anonymized collection of gene scans represents a huge sample of genetic profiles from which researchers hope to decipher connections between DNA and disease. The data appears to be valuable enough that Pfizer isn’t the only big pharma company looking to dig further. Last week, according to a Forbes , 23andMe inked a deal with Genentech worth $10 million up front, and up to $50 million if further milestones are reached.

With two big names already on their roster of clients, it’s likely that other major pharmaceutical companies will follow suit in hopes of leveling the competitive playing field. And in fact 23andMe has said it would announce a total of 10 similar deals with drugmakers and biotechnology companies this year. It’s also likely, though, that collaborating with so many big pharmaceutical companies will bring renewed scrutiny from privacy advocates who have criticized the collection of so much highly personal data into one place.

But controversy is nothing new to 23andMe, and as its tests sit on the shelf, it’s understandable the company would look to capitalize on one of its most valuable assets. Leveraging its data has always been part of 23andMe’s business plan. If pharmaceutical companies are able to sift that data and uncover new treatments, that data could come to benefit us all.

Our Meticulous Google Hangout Recap of the Golden Globes

Best Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture (Presented by Jennifer Aniston and Benedict Cumberbatch)

Rubin: Taniston.

Watercutter: CUMBERBATCH

Rubin: “She got 4 4s”—my wife, with the Friends deep cut

Crucchiola: Taniston!

LOLOL

Rubin: Someone counted Mississippily!

Crucchiola: I think that was my favorite throw to an awards present ever.

Rubin: Ethan Hawke has turned into Young Bill Paxton.

Crucchiola: Early advantage WHIPLASH!

Watercutter: And the band gets to play jazz!

Rubin: “And the award goes to…JK Simmons! No, wait, sorry, that should have been ‘J/K, it goes to Mark Ruffalo.”

Rubin: I kinda hoped he’d accept in character as Cave Johnson from Portal 2.

Crucchiola: Let’s never forget Oz.

Rubin: Or as the mogul from Party Down.

Watercutter: Miles Teller is Robin?!

Rubin: Always struck me as more of a Nightwing.

Watercutter: “He inspired me every day to want to scream at him and hit him in the face.” – JK Simmons on Miles “Boy Wonder” Teller

Crucchiola: It’s nice to see JK getting this spotlight. He’s fantastic.

Rubin: Lorne Michaels looking straight St. Tropez at the Simmons table. How did that happen?

Best Supporting Actress in a Series, Miniseries, or TV Movie (Presented By the Leads of Fifty Shades of Grey)

Crucchiola: There is ALREADY negative chemistry between Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan!

Rubin: “And, in one more stab at making you care about Fifty Shades of Grey…”

Rubin: Weird that Michelle Monaghan didn’t win for a role she inhabited for approximately 17 seconds an episode.

Watercutter: Joanne Froggatt wins.

Watercutter: Downton Domination

Crucchiola: Cathy Bates losing is not an acceptable answer.

“This is the most shocking moment of my life” is not anything a Downton winner can say.

Kehe: Are we always to be made uncomfortable by the long awkward walk from table to stage?

Rubin: It gets staggerier as the night goes on.

Watercutter: I’m so glad that it appears Jessica Chastain at the front table.

That means she’ll always be there as we await people walking to stage.

Crucchiola: I would deliver my whole speech to her.

And just thank her. For everything.

Kehe: First commercial break. Impressions?

Rubin: No one told me that live-chatting awards show meant having to sit through commercials. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?

So far so meh?

Watercutter: The opening bit was nice.

Crucchiola: I liked the duo-logue.

Watercutter: And I’ll never be mad JK Simmons won something.

Crucchiola: Oh but now we get to watch coming attractions commercials!

Watercutter: Blackhat!

Rubin: H4CK3RZ WITH GUNS

Kehe: /shirtless Chris Hemsworth

Crucchiola: YES, PLEASE

Rubin: h4xth0r

Damn, wish I had thought of that one first.

Watercutter: Yes, Peter, yessss!

Best TV Miniseries or Movie (Presented by Jennifer Lopez and Jeremy Renner)

Rubin: Clumsy joke #Million: “It’s J-Locut and Huh-Guy!”

Kehe: What part of JLo’s dress did she rip off for her earrings?

Rubin: All of it, I think.

Crucchiola: Good win for FX with Fargo.

Kehe: FARGO!

Rubin: Dark horse!

Crucchiola: I support Martin Freeman’s endeavors.

Rubin: As do I, I just wish I liked the show more.

Crucchiola: The just-before-they-hit-the-stage cam is uncomfortable.

Rubin: Wallace Shawn is looking younger than ever!

Crucchiola: “We’re gonna do it again” was very defiant.

Like someone is trying to STOP FARGO.

Rubin: Maybe just global warming.

Best Actor in a TV Miniseries or Movie

Crucchiola: Ohhhhh good category!

Woody vs. Matthew!

Rubin: I think McConnaughey’s been here since last year

Watercutter: Ok, True Detective will win SOMETHING here, right?

Crucchiola: THE WALLACE SHAWN BABY!!!

I’m going for Woody!!

FARGO DOUBLE UPSET!

Watercutter: Billy Bob Thornton!

Kehe: Back to back FARGOS.

Rubin: Jeremy Renner’s chemistry with J-Lo’s breasts is also terrible.

Watercutter: Billy Bob almost just did finger guns.

Kehe: “Fargo” hereinafter my word for “upset.”

Rubin: Good, because I’m Fargo about this acceptance speech.

Crucchiola: Billy rocking the paisley-esque print shirt, since forever.

Watercutter: “I’m just gonna say ‘thank you.'”—Thanks for that, Billy Bob.

Naomi Watts Takes the Stage

Crucchiola: WOW. YES NAOMI.

Rubin: Iced Out Herpetologist.

Watercutter: Is she wearing a snake made of diamonds?

Rubin: That’s what she’s doing!

Crucchiola: I think Birdman‘s got comedy/musical and Boyhood has drama.

Neither of those are interesting thoughts, but still.

Kehe: Has any favorite won so far? Are there even favorites?

Crucchiola: Fair point, Jason.

No one has BUZZ this year.

And does that mean nothing was good or that there was TOO much good?

Watercutter: Nothing is on an unstoppable run.

Crucchiola: In a year where Box Office was down year over year from 2013.

Watercutter: … but when we have more prestige TV than ever.

Crucchiola: Also, Page Six tweets that Entourage is filming AT the Globes tonight… Gross?

Watercutter: Margaret Cho! (Right?)

Rubin: Margaret Cho bout to get HACKED, y’all.

Crucchiola: Margaret Cho was born to do this.

Watercutter: C-Batch photobomb!

Benedict has been perfecting that move for a while now.

Crucchiola: Meryl gives the standing O for freedom of speech chat!

Audience follows!

Meryl is their guide. And they listen.

Kehe: We wouldn’t be doing this recap right now if it weren’t for Alan Turing—gay grandfather of WIRED magazine.

Lead Actress in a TV Comedy or Musical (Presented by Kerry Washington and Bryan Cranston)

Crucchiola: Do we think Cranston will win this year just because we don’t know what else to do?

THE CW ACTRESS WON?!?!?!

Watercutter: Jane the Virgin surprise!

Rubin: Jane the Virgin going FARGO on these fools.

Crucchiola: Whoooaaaaaaa!!!!!!

This will be, no matter what, the biggest upset of the night.

Rubin: I hope she gives an immaculate acceptance.

Crucchiola: OK, not that this girl doesn’t deserve it—I haven’t watched Jane the Virgin—but is the HFPA trolling?

Rubin: Kerry Washington and Bryan Cranston have no idea who Gina Rodriguez is.

Crucchiola: They just downed Netflix, HBO and Showtime

Watercutter: OK, that speech *was* great.

Kehe: Idk about immaculate but I was moved.

Crucchiola: Bless her little surprised heart.

Kehe: Suddenly I want Jane the Virgin to win everything since we’re clearly living in an alternate reality.

Best TV Comedy or Musical

Crucchiola: TRANSPARENT!

Watercutter: TRANSPARENT

Rubin: TRANSPARENT

Crucchiola: That whole category (best comedy series) was all women and minorities. Besides Silicon Valley.

Rubin: That’s what I was about to say!

Kehe: Meh—was I the ONLY person who found that show depressing?

Rubin: It was depressing and more.

Rubin: Jill Soloway: a deserver of Everything.

Crucchiola: 2014 REproves it was the biggest year in the history of trans discourse.

Watercutter: Alcorn dedication = my heart squeezes.

Rubin: Also shouting out her “mapa” is huge.

Crucchiola: Nothing is predictable.

I have no idea what’s going to happen!

Kehe: “To love” – absolutely. But none of those characters were particularly lovable.

Watercutter: I tend to enjoy flawed characters.

For those who want background on that Leelah Alcorn bit, here.

Kehe: I NEVER recognize Sienna Miller.

Apparently she was in Foxcatcher.

Best Original Score in a Motion Picture

Crucchiola: What TWIST will score deploy??

Watercutter: First win for Theory of Everything!

Kehe: Iceland! Discovered on some obscure Dutch music blog, no doubt.

Best Original Song in a Motion Picture (Presented by Prince)

Crucchiola: PRINCE?!?!?!?

THAT SWAGGER!

Kehe: The Hollywood Foreign Press obviously voted per the recs of the Dutch music bloggers.

Watercutter: Louis CK is so down for PRINCE right now.

Crucchiola: Oh, his voice.

It’s like slow rolling honey.

Rubin: I think I just got pregnant.

Crucchiola: Second that.

Kehe: Sia wrote a song for Annie?!

Crucchiola: I want original song to be Lorde!

Rubin: Just went back to see Allison Janney lose her shit over Prince.

Well worth it.

Crucchiola: Damn. We just got cheated out of a Lorde speech.

In her smart pants suit.

Watercutter: And a moment between Lorde and Prince.

Rubin: Chrissy Teigen’s husband seems very nice.

Crucchiola: Common can’t turn off his poet.

Rubin: And the giant humanoid cat who is Common gets a nice introduction to confused viewers!

Damn, Common, can John Legend get a word in?

Someone please GIF Chrissy Teigen’s face.

She looked stricken.

Watercutter: Right? She kinda forgot she was at a televised show there for a minute.

Kehe: Oprah’s quivering lower lip was basically me during Selma. I cried poetically for two hours.

Crucchiola: I don’t think I was ever not crying for Selma.

Just passive/active crying back and forth for two hours.

Watercutter: I only stopped crying during Selma once I was fully dehydrated.

Crucchiola: Hahahaha

So does Kat Dennings

Crucchiola: Oh NO

Watercutter:

Rubin: Oh noooo.

Best Supporting Actor in Series, Miniseries, or TV Movie (Presented by Katie Holmes and Seth Meyers)

Crucchiola: Aww Katie Holmes is here!

I like when she’s busy.

Rubin: I had no idea she was this tall

Kehe: This is the most she’s worked in a while.

Rubin: Or that Seth Meyers is a wee child.

Watercutter: BOMER

Kehe: Um, I think I’d like to see a Seth Meyer-Katie Holmes Weekend Update?

Watercutter: Alan Cumming in khaki.

Rubin: Alan Cumming goes Full Ecru!

Crucchiola: NORMAL HEART!

Kehe: YAY NORMAL HEART.

Crucchiola: MATT BOMER

This is probably why he didn’t do Fifty Shades.

Watercutter: Everyone should take note of Bomer’s suit.

Kehe: OK. This is the most progressive Globes ever.

Crucchiola: It’s STAGGERING.

Almost suspiciously progressive.

Rubin: They have three kids?

Watercutter: … And now I’m crying over The Normal Heart all over again.

Kehe: Humanity has miraculously leapt forward, like, a good generation.

Rubin: Keep in mind it’s the foreign press.

Crucchiola: On the heals of a distressing year.

That’s nice to see.

Rubin: Humanity is Huge in Europe.

Clive Owen Presents Theory of Everything

Watercutter: I’ve watched so much Knick this year I’m just presuming Clive Owen is high on coke right now.

Rubin: Friend of WIRED Eddie Redmayne!

Crucchiola: Hey Eddie!

Miss you!

Watercutter: Eddie!

Best Lead Actress in a Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical (Presented By Ricky Gervais)

Rubin: Did not miss you, Ricky.

Crucchiola: Ricky says “celebrity” like he ISN’T one.

Kehe: “Streep”—not enough people call her that.

Crucchiola: Amy Adams!

Well, that’s nice!

Watercutter: Amy just said on the red carpet she expected to not win.

WRONG AMY.

Crucchiola: The Globes love Amy.

Rubin: Hey, remember when she and Isla Fisher were the same person?

Crucchiola: So far the Oscars love her less.

Which makes me sad.

Rubin: And then Amy Adams started winning everything?

Kehe: I think we’ll need to watch the 8 p.m. broadcast because all the winners will surely be different.

Rubin: And now Isla Fisher just sits somewhere and has to act amused by Sasha Baron Cohen?

Watercutter: LOL

Crucchiola: Hahahahaha Jason you’re SO right!

Men and straight people and white people will win all of them in the 8 p.m. telecast

Watercutter: Everyone Loves Christoph!

Crucchiola: I believe Amy was genuinely surprised just now.

Crucchiola: … Where is Shailene Woodley??

Will she presenting the Mother Gaia award in this celebration of women at the Golden Globes??

Rubin: I was sure she’d pop up when the actress from Jane Divergent won for best actress.

…I’ll see myself out

Kehe: No!

That was my only LOL of the night

Watercutter:

Thanks, Internet.

Rubin: That was really a tremendous photobomb.

Crucchiola: It’s so perfect it looks fake.

Watercutter: He’s great at it.

Kehe: It’s so cartoony. Is there a trampoline?

Crucchiola: Like, digitally manipulated.

Rubin: SPROING

Best Animated Feature (Presented by Salma Hayek and Kevin Hart)

Watercutter: Hey, it’s Everly!

Crucchiola: Lil’ Kev!

Rubin: … and Keverly!

Crucchiola:

Hahahahaha!

Watercutter: I Hart Keverly.

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Rubin: HEYOOOO.

Watercutter: … now I’ll show myself out.

Crucchiola: It was nice of Salma to stand up there and be Kevin Hart’s audience member.

Gruyere?

Is that what she said?

Greer!

Greer Grammer!

Rubin: Judy Gruyere.

Crucchiola: “You’re the dude of the moment”—Salma

Watercutter: Really?

Kehe: Not Lego Movies?!

Crucchiola: WHAT THE HELL?!?!

Rubin: Big Hero 6 gets Fargoed by HTTYD2!

On the plus side, I would very much like this guy [How to Train Your Dragon 2 director Dean DeBlois, right] to rescue me from a burning building.

Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture (Presented by Jared Leto)

Watercutter: Marry Me, Meryl.

I am so bewitched.

Rubin: How to train your preciousness, Jared Leto.

OK, best supporting actress, motion picture.

Watercutter: I can’t choose in this category. I can’t.

Kehe: C’mon, Patricia.

Rubin: Jared Leto looks like a soda jerk.

Kehe: YES THANK YOU.

Crucchiola: Boyhood strikes.

Watercutter: Patricia Arquette—so deserved!

Crucchiola: I get it.

And I’m happy about it.

But I still can’t be moved away from Jessica Chastain.

Kehe: She’s trembling. I love her.

Kehe: I’d like her to win the Oscar. I thought she was the best part of Boyhood.

Watercutter: She was.

Kehe: She evolved as both a character and actress before our eyes.

Crucchiola:

Kehe: I want fingers like that.

They’re murder weapons.

Crucchiola: For .

Crucchiola: FINALLY more Tina and Amy!

Rubin: Gotta say, not as sure about this Interview

bit.

Best Screenplay (Presented by Kristen Wiig and Bill Hader)

Watercutter: The Skeleton Twins!

Rubin: Skeleton twinz!

Crucchiola: Yay the Skeleton Twins!

Kehe: Nothing’s gonna stop them now.

Watercutter: I want him to slip into Stefon for just a second. “It’s that thing, where a bunch of street punks act out Terminator on mescaline…”

Crucchiola:

Rubin: I want this to keep going.

Watercutter: I wish I could “heart” this presentation.

Rubin: Screenplay bets?

Crucchiola: Birdman?

I’d be real happy with Gone Girl.

Rubin: Boyhood or Imitation Game.

Kehe: Betting is futile.

Watercutter: Birdman. Though I love Imitation Game.

Rubin: Birdman!

Crucchiola: BIRDMAN ATTACKS

Rubin: Wow. That’s crazy.

Watercutter: All 50 writers get on stage!

Rubin: Not in a bad way!

And 12 birds!

Those guys seem like a fun night out.

Watercutter:“He’s a badass!”—Jack Black on Richard Linklater

Best Lead Actor in a TV Comedy (Presented by Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin)

Crucchiola: JANE FONDA LOOKS THE BEST.

Rubin: Well, if it isn’t HANOI JANE.

Kehe: Hahahaha.

Watercutter: Jesus Jane Fonda

Crucchiola: ONE TRUE PAIRING

“I thought you were just high that day.”

Kehe: I WAS JUST GONNA SAY: they’re definitely both stoned.

Crucchiola: “Well, two things can be true.”

Someone get Jane a panini!

Watercutter: These two are crushing it.

Crucchiola: Well, I think next year’s hosts were just christened.

Rubin: They just called House of Lies “House of Cards.”

Kehe: Again, stoned.

Crucchiola: They’re drunk.

Rubin: Jeffrey Tambor!

Kehe: I’m looking forward to this acceptance speech.

Crucchiola: The male contenders category was just won by the person playing a trans woman.

The progressiveness builds!!

Rubin: “And that is why you ALWAYS LEAVE A NOTE.”

Crucchiola: HA!

Crucchiola: “This is big. This is much bigger than me.”

You go, Jeffrey!

Kehe: I’ve only had one glass of wine but I feel drunk on progress.

Watercutter: “To Amazon, my new best friend.”

Dedication to the transgender community—YES.

Kehe: “Thank you for your patience.” That’s it, guys.

Crucchiola: “Thank you for letting us be a part of the change.”

Watercutter: “Thank you for letting us be a part of the change.”

Rubin: “Thank you for letting us be a part of the change” is an enduring quote.

Kehe: I need to excuse myself.

Watercutter: Jinx

Kehe: It’s a night for tears. This is really legitimizing the Hollywood Foreign Press for me.

Best Foreign Film (Presented by Lupita Nyong’o and Colin Farrell)

Crucchiola: YAY LUPITA!

I’ve missed her!

Kehe: It’s kinda a shame we had to endure Cosby and Interview jokes.

Rubin: Colin Farrell has escaped from a Zane Grey book cover

Kehe: I love Lupita’s glasses!

Rubin: Her brother is somewhere fumbling around myopically.

Best Actress in a TV Miniseries or Movie (Presented by Kate Beckinsale and Adrien Brody)

Crucchiola: I just heard Kate Beckinsale is the star of “The Disappointment’s Room.”

That can’t be right

LET IT BE LANGE!

Rubin: I think it’s “The Disappointment Shroom.”

Crucchiola: Huh.

The Honorable Woman.

Kehe: Another Fargo—except Fargo woman didn’t win.

Crucchiola: The inability to predict just KEEPS ON BUILDING.

Watercutter: I want to know what Maggie and Jake Gyllenhaal talk about when they have dinner.

Kehe: Their unusual bone structure, for sure.

Rubin: “So which one of us looks like Buzz Lightyear and which looks like a cabbage-leaf baby?”

Crucchiola: LOLOLOL

Maggie is so eloquent.

Rubin: Maggie Gyllenhaal: Turned On By Evolution!

(Maxim.com’s headline tomorrow)

Kehe: Her husband is a lover of complicated women. How evolutionary!

Rubin: She’s not just a winner, she’s a DAR-winner!

Kehe: Someone get this girl a KALE SALAD.

Rubin: (I mean she’s a member of the Daughters of the American Revolution.)

Crucchiola: Do you guys think Gina Rodriguez is still alive?

Watercutter: Tina’s Tux Just Won

Best TV Drama (Presented by Paul Rudd and Adam Levine)

Rubin: Paul Rudd and an oil slick currently on stage.

Watercutter: Sorry … now I’m writing in headlines for some reason.

Crucchiola: The Affair wins.

It’s opposite day!

Rubin:You Won’t Believe What Happened When Tina Fey Wore a Tux

Kehe: Was Affair supposed to win? Because the cameraman definitely fell over.

Crucchiola: No one tonight was supposed to win.

Kehe: Except HUMANITY.

Watercutter: You can’t win for something called The Affair and forget to thank your husband.

Kehe: Or can you?

Presentation for Pride

Watercutter: Gays!

Rubin: So now we know that Pride is a lock.

Crucchiola: I’m calling it now

Pride is winning this category.

Rubin: Any other night, not a chance.

Rubin: Tonight? Double rainbows for everyone.

Best Lead Actor in a TV Drama

Crucchiola: If Kevin Spacey wins Kate Mara can just be the trophy he holds in his hands.

Rubin: Francis Underwood with the win!

Watercutter: Kate is so happy for him!

Crucchiola: For a BISEXUAL POLITICIAN!

Watercutter: Never put down the drink, Kevin!

Rubin: He didn’t win a golden globe until he sexed a dude.

ON SCREEN

Watercutter: With his on-screen wife!

Rubin: Ben Foster is looking menacing.

Kehe: What was Kevin Spacey talking about? I…spaced.

Rubin: Stanley Kramer?

Watercutter: If Kevin Spacey gets any better I may not be able to handle it.

Rubin: Or nondairy creamer?

Crucchiola: This ideas as an abused alien commercial makes me really sad.

Rubin: “GE: We’ll Jim Henson the shit outta your ideas.”

Crucchiola: I hope your wife loved that one.

Rubin: We were both too busy screaming in terror at the idea.

Kehe: What about [Rubin’s dog] Crosby?

Rubin: If it’s not a back issue of Spy, he doesn’t have time for it.

Crucchiola: What a hipster.

Rubin: He rode here on a bike made out of antique tuba parts!

Watercutter: He wants you to switch over to Girls doesn’t he?

Crucchiola: That may have been the most on-point joke of the evening.

Kehe: HAHA.

Peter, you can write the Globes next year.

Crucchiola: That was a Tina/Amy joke.

Crucchiola: So, can Tina and Amy write the jokes again?

WHERE are they?!

George Clooney Gets the Cecil B. DeMille Award (Presented by Julianna Margulies and Don Cheadle)

Watercutter: We’re all FoGs!

Friends of George.

Rubin: Frugals of Gourmet

Crucchiola: I’m so jealous of Amal Alamuddin’s husband.

Kehe: Tribute to George opens with view of Earth from space: because he’s god.

Rubin: Why does this George Clooney reel feature no Facts of Life or Roseanne clips?

Crucchiola: That’s a failure.

Rubin: Cecil B. DeFEAT

Rubin: Obligatory Leatherheads moment.

THERE’S my Out of Sight clip.

Watercutter: Jules!

Kehe: He calls her “Jules.”

Crucchiola: When he said Jules and Don she was VISIBLY overwhelmed.

That was the greatest moment of her life.

We should all respect that the Clooney-sance predated the McConaissance.

This guy had a mullet in Rosanne.

Watercutter: George has on a “Je Suis Charlie” button on.

Crucchiola: And only started making consistent credibility pictures after like 2000.

Watching George Clooney be bashful about Amal is the most endearing thing he’s ever done.

Watercutter: It’s impossible for this man to not be charming.

Crucchiola: I want him to call me Jules.

It’s not my name and I don’t care.

Watercutter: Side note: I want some SF theater programmer to make a Fifty Shades of Grey and Magic Mike XXL double bill.

Rubin: How many categories are left? I just had my second birthday since this started.

Best Director (Presented by Harrison Ford)

Crucchiola: Does Harrison have his earring in??

Check!

Rubin: He does!

Watercutter: Soon to be seen in Star Wars Something Or Another, Harrison Ford.

Crucchiola: OK, so Linklater for director is the only think that hasn’t surprised me.

Kehe: I imagined Richard Linklater very differently.

Crucchiola: Less dude-like?

Kehe: Yeah.

Rubin: Not like Owen Wilson with gravitas?

Crucchiola: He kind of SOUNDS like Owen Wilson

Oh… indeed Peter.

Best Lead Actress in a TV Drama (Presented by Anna Faris and Chris Pratt)

Crucchiola: Look at that TRIM man!

Chris Pratt!

Rubin: Glad Chris Pratt is still “from Parks and Rec…” and not “Marvel anabolic freakshow…”

Crucchiola: Claire can’t win.

It’s too easy.

Ruth Wilson!

Rubin: Viola Davis is 3000% better than anything else about that How To Get Away With Murder.

I didn’t know Luther’s Stalker had a real name!

Crucchiola: I’m glad Ruth Wilson won on the strength of her role in Luther alone.

Rubin: Resolved: we will all watch The Affair now.

Crucchiola: No one in the audience is laughing at her jokes.

Because they don’t know what she’s talking about.

Because they haven’t seen The Affair.

Watercutter: “Dom, your ass is something of great beauty.” Well, OK then!

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Kehe: In keeping with tonight’s theme:

Rubin: THERE we go.

Nancy McKeon approves.

Crucchiola: Well now we know WHY he got the honor.

He was EXPERIMENTING!

Watercutter: George Clooney: Original Lesbian

Crucchiola: GOL

Kehe: GOL. LOL.

Best Lead Actor in a Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical

Watercutter: Yes, Keaton! #MyBatman

Crucchiola: Man, Michael Keaton is SO awesome!

Kehe: Michael Keaton thanks HFPA for having a comedy category? Doesn’t the rest of the world disagree?

Crucchiola:

Rubin: Michael Keaton is in the third act of a Frank Capra movie right now.

Watercutter: Keaton’s number on the McCon-O-Meter right now is very high.

Rubin: Amy Poehler teared up a little, I think.

Watercutter: Again, Fey’s Tux Wins.

Rubin: Keaton got at least 400 millMcConaughheys.

Kehe: Oprah looks AWESOME. Gale agrees.

Gayle*

Rubin: Stedman is just happy to be here.

Crucchiola: He’s glad Gayle let him come.

Channing Tatum Presents Foxcatcher

Rubin: The Chan-Chan Man!

Speaking of Cecil B. DeBurnt.

Watercutter: Chan-Chan the Spray Tan Man

Rubin: My man is looking straight flame-broiled.

Watercutter: Still love him forever and a day.

Rubin: Charnel Taylun!

Best Motion Picture, Comedy or Musical

Crucchiola: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????

Rubin: Wes Blanderson

Watercutter: All together now … “Huh?”

Rubin:… at least it had Bill Murray in it?

Crucchiola:

Watercutter: I just don’t know how that beat Birdman.

Kehe: OK, so drama predictions? Lego Movie??

Best Lead Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Crucchiola: MORE JULIANNE.

Reese. REVERSE AGING.

Watercutter: YES

Crucchiola: Heeeyyyyyyyy STILL ALICE!!!!

Watercutter: JULIANNE!

Kehe: JULIANNA MOOOOOORE!

Crucchiola: Her dress suggests she is VERY surprised she won.

As it has NO mobility.

Rubin: Is that Osh Kosh B’Gosh?

Watercutter: I’m so glad Julianne was able to get some use out of Katniss’s Mockingjay dress.

Crucchiola: Please let this foreshadow her long-delayed Oscar win

Watercutter: Yes—this better put her high on the Oscar list.

Kehe: Her accrual of milliMcConaugheys begins.

Lead Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama

Crucchiola: EDDIE WON!!!!!

Rubin: WHOA

Kehe: NOOOOOOOO

Watercutter: Friend of WIRED Eddie Wins!

Crucchiola: THE WIRED ENDORESEMENT PAYS OFF!!!

Rubin: Nice work Mr. Redmayne!

Rubin:I am legitimately happy for this guy.

Crucchiola: Wondrous!

Rubin: His hands are shaking. Endearing.

Watercutter: So happy for him!

Crucchiola: Every woman at Wired is ready to enter a plural marriage with Eddie and Hannah.

Kehe: Uh, and every man.

Crucchiola: Fair.

Rubin: Sorry, saving myself for that giant dude who made How To Train Your Dragon 2.

Crucchiola: My apologies.

Crucchiola:

Crucchiola: Swoon-factor DEFINITELY matters in the race for milliMcConaugheys.

Best Motion Picture, Drama (Presented by Living Goddess Meryl Streep)

Watercutter: Marry Me, Meryl.

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Crucchiola: And now for your clinic in stage presence,

by Meryl Streep.

Watercutter:Really, really tough category.

Boyhood!

Crucchiola: I get it.

Kehe: Great.

Crucchiola: But I’m already bored by it.

Crucchiola: “Biggest leap in film history”?

Richard.

Watercutter: Ethan Hawke made sure to get his Meryl Moment right there.

Rubin: Cho with the signoff!

Watercutter: Someone GIF Amy with that glass, right now.

Rubin: Great Cho, everyone.

Not the worst Globes ever!

Watercutter: After all that sad they have to remind us that Parks and Rec is ending?

Kehe: Real winners: Naomi’s serpent necklace, Prince, Gayle, HFPA

Rubin: Seriously.

I’m going to agree with all of those.

Watercutter: Real Heroes: Tambor, Bomer, Jessica Chastain (for being Jessica Chastain).

Crucchiola: All right. Going forward to Oscars: Boyhood‘s to lose? Keaton? Moore?

Rubin: Indeed.

Watercutter: Gotta say, I’m a little bummed that there wasn’t more love for Selma, but that’s neither here nor there.

Kehe: Anything can/should happen. I almost don’t want to grant anyone frontrunner status.

One prediction I will make: Next year’s hosts will be Kristen Wiig and Bill Hader, with jokes by Peter Rubin.

Watercutter: My dream!

Kehe: You incepted the idea, and now I’m gonna campaign for it.

Watercutter: And with that, we look forward to next year!

G’nite y’all! I’m going to watch the repeat… Or at least the duo-logue.