This Week’s Apple Rumors, Ranked From Dumbest to Most Plausible

Mockups give us a possible closer look at what the iPhone 6 could look like this week. Ariel Zambelich/WIRED

Each week, there are dozens of rumors, reports, and patent filings that hint at what’s coming out of Cupertino next. Some are legit, but many are totally bogus. As always, we’ve parsed the rumors, ranking them in order from “utterly ridiculous” to “duh, of course.” First up…

DON’T COUNT ON IT: ‘iPhone Air’ Could Launch September 25

Mid-September to early October is the expected time frame for Apple’s next big product launch. According to one report, September 25 looks like the date the next iPhone could go on sale after a September 15 event announcement. This seems dubious as Apple usually launches products on Fridays, and the 25th is a Thursday. Apparently, the larger 5.5-inch model is going to be dubbed the “iPhone Air,” though. This wouldn’t surprise us, considering there’s an Air in the MacBook line and iPad line now. Calling the larger model the Air would differentiate it from the “regular” iPhone 6.

DON’T COUNT ON IT: Mockups Offer ‘Rough Approximation’ of iPhone 6 Design

While they’re not much to look at, a new report out of Japan claims that the latest set of mockups gives a rough approximation of what the next iPhone should look like. More importantly, they supposedly offer a better sense of antenna placement in the new phone. Those stripes along the backside of the iPhone ‘leaks’ we’ve been seeing? Those apparently aren’t supposed to be stripes, but rather denote areas where glass will be used instead of aluminum, just like in the iPhone 5s. If the stripes are present, though, they’ll be made out of polished glass. This glass is necessary so that the iPhone’s antennas can transmit and receive data. Aluminum blocks those signals. This report also says the Apple logo on the rear of the iPhone will be different than in the past, carved out of the aluminum, and that the glass may be curved. An artist also gave their rendition of what the iPhone 6 could look like in an unrelated photo set of mockups.

ASK AGAIN LATER: Photos of iPhone 6 Front Glass Appear

Historically accurate Apple parts leaker Sonny Dickson sent 9to5Mac photos of what’s claimed to be the front glass plate of the next iPhone. The glass plates pictured are both the black and white versions of the 4.7-inch model. According to these images, the new iPhone will be slightly wider than the iPhone 5/5s, and noticeably longer. The only possible design difference from current iPhones is a hole to the left of the front speaker, which could house either a sensor or a repositioned FaceTime camera. We’re getting closer to the iPhone’s impending launch, so parts leaks—while still questionable—have a higher likelihood of being the genuine.

ASK AGAIN LATER: Gas-Filled Earbud Design Could Improve Fidelity

This week the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office awarded Apple a patent for the earbud version of ‘plasma speakers’. In this type of speaker, a gas like helium is used behind the speaker’s vibrating cone reproducing sounds more exactly than normal air would. But, in order for this to work, the barometric pressure needs to be controlled (sudden changes in air pressure can cause the speaker’s diaphragm to stick). Apple would address this with a vented cavity where ambient air can be compressed to adjust for surrounding air pressure.

ASK AGAIN LATER: Next iPhone Getting Thinner Thanks to New Display Tech

Apple loves making its products as thin as physically possible, so it’s not surprising to hear (or think) the company will try to make the next iPhone skinnier. One way Apple will reportedly do this is by using one brightness enhancing display layer instead of two. This change in design and production could lead to yield issues since that single layer needs to be high quality enough to do the job that two used to perform. The report says Apple will continue to use in-cell display technology, though. Like other recent reports, this one says that Apple will begin mass production of the iPhone this month, and it’ll be released some time in September.

ASK AGAIN LATER: iPhone Authentication Settings Could Change Based on Location

While this is just a patent application from Apple it makes sense as a possible future evolution of iOS: Apple could adjust the interface and security levels of your mobile device depending on your location. When you’re at home, your device would have a lower security level, but while you’re at a restaurant or at the mall, it would require Touch ID authentication before granting you access to the device. Unsecure Wi-Fi hotspots could also trigger higher security settings for the device, for instance with applications like your Address Book or Calendar. Apple thinks these changes could be implemented without significantly compromising overall device security, and it would certainly make things more convenient for the user.

SIGNS POINT TO YES: Voice Messaging Could Be Key Feature of iWatch

Apple introduced a new voice messaging feature as part of iOS 8 at WWDC this year which lets users record a short audio or video message and send it to a contact. After meeting with Tim Cook, one analyst thinks this could be a key feature of Apple’s iWatch. And it would make sense. Voice messaging and message dictation are already popular in China, a huge market that Apple wants a greater foothold in. After using Android Wear smartwatches, the voice dictation features of Google Now are very much the highlight of the experience. Voice messaging could be an easy, quick way to differentiate Apple’s wearable.

SIGNS POINT TO YES: Apple’s Upcoming Photos App Won’t Be Pro-Focused

While Apple confirmed to Ars Technica that Yosemite and iOS 8′s new Photos offering will include professional-grade features such as “image search, editing, effects, and most notably, third-party extensibility,” it looks like the app will not feature the sort of robust editing tools pro users require. Images on Apple’s website and in the keynote also seem to suggest that the app will largely rely on more straightforward photo editing features.

Dear America, Here’s a Playlist to Make Your July 4th Extra-Patriotic

Columbia

For a number of months now, we’ve been posting weekly playlists of new music—which is great, but sometimes circumstances demand something a bit more…canonical. And a national holiday might be just that kind of circumstance. Therefore, in observation of today’s traffic jam/barbecue/unwise home pyrotechnic displays, we rounded up 30 of our favorite American-ish songs (mostly pro-, though a few anti-). From standards to punk anthems, to a surprising amount of Jay-Z—who’s the American Dream personified, if you think about it—let this playlist be the soundtrack to whatever ill-advised madness you can cook up. (But be careful out there—it’s tough to use a mouse if you’ve blown your fingers off.) And don’t worry: We’ll be back next week with our usual new-music recommendations for you to get irrationally upset about.

The tracks:

Ray Charles, “America The Beautiful”

Bob Dylan, “The Times They Are A-Changin’”

Simon & Garfunkel, “America”

America, “Ventura Highway”

The Guess Who, “American Woman”

Bruce Springsteen, “Born in the U.S.A.

John Mellencamp, “R.O.C.K. in the U.S.A.”

Tom Petty, “American Girl”

James Brown, “Livin’ in America”

Brooks & Dunn “Only in America”

Neil Diamond, “America”

Grand Funk Railroad, “We’re an American Band”

Miley Cyrus, “Party In The U.S.A.”

Katy Perry, “Firework”

Estelle feat. Kanye West, “American Boy”

2 Live Crew, “Banned in the U.S.A.”

Lil Wayne, “God Bless Amerika”

Watch the Throne, “Made in America”

Young Jeezy feat. Jay-Z & Nas, “My President is Black (Remix)”

Eminem, “White America”

Jay-Z, “American Dreamin’”

George Clinton feat. Ice Cube, Dr. Dre, Public Enemy, Yo-Yo, MC Breed, Kam, “Paint the White House Black”

The Goats, “Typical American”

Public Enemy, “Fight The Power”

Green Day, “American Idiot”

Bad Brains, “Banned In D.C.”

Black Flag, “American Waste”

Pennywise, “God Save The USA”

The So So Glos, “Son Of An American”

Titus Andronicus, “A More Perfect Union”

YouTube

The Week’s Best TV: Melissa McCarthy’s Jet Ski Fail and the Leftovers Premiere

Anything we could say here to commemorate The Independence Day has already been said better by President Bill Pullman: “Mankind—that word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can’t be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it’s fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom, not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution—but from annihilation. We’re fighting for our right to live, to exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day when the world declared in one voice: ‘We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive!’ Today, we celebrate our Independence Day!” And with that unified beating heart, we give you now the most patriotic of weekly TV round ups. May the wings of liberty never lose a feather.

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver — Uganda and Pepe Julian Onziema Part 1

Ladies and gentlemen, John Oliver. Again. Watch the current Host With the Most lambaste Uganda for its egregious violations against human rights as it ramps up prosecution (read: persecution) of gays in the country, and then call out the United States for its role in the internationally embarrassing witch hunt going on in the African nation. This weekend, we will let freedom reign in the U.S. of A, but amidst all that flag-waving and fire-cracking let’s all take a second to recognize what happens when hate speech turns into hate action. And then, let us all aspire to be as kind and wise as Oliver’s This Week guest, LGBT activist Pepe Julian Onziema. Onziema used to identify as a lesbian, but is now a trans man, and living in a nation where being gay just became outright illegal—thanks largely to the efforts of American missionaries who have traveled abroad to “educate” the peoples of the world. It’s a sad, disappointing story, but one still lined with hope if individuals like Onziema can emerge to show us the best of our humanity, despite being face-to-face with the worst of it.

The Leftovers — The Event

It’s finally here! The ennui-laden promo assault for HBO’s new dramatic series The Leftovers has culminated in the premiere of an actual show! For a time, it seemed like the whole thing might have been a performance art stunt put on by the network in cahoots with electronic crooner James Blake (his “Retrograde” featured prominently in the early teasers). But on Sunday we got an actual hour of TV. For better or worse, Leftovers comes by way of Lost co-creator Damon Lindelof. And if the idea of a Lost alum spearheading a show about a “mysterious event” that leaves a small community of people adrift and searching for answers makes you nervous (it makes us nervous), try seeking solace in the words of Tom Perrotta, who authored the show’s source material: “Even though I like using the word ‘Rapture’ because it makes it clear what happened, I also want to disconnect it from its religious context,” Perrotta told The New York Times. “I was interested in borrowing this scenario to think about collective trauma and grief and the speed of history.” OK, so it’s not a show in which the audience should expect a seasons-long grand and sweeping mystery to be solved but the answer turns out to be “JK! Purgatory!”? It’s just a super moody meditation on human misery? Great news! We feel much better. Overall, the The Leftovers premiere was solid. After so much buildup, we were careful to go in with measured expectations so as not to hold a single episode responsible for fulfilling the expectations of an entire series—especially one with such a crazy trailer campaign, which provided a whole series of existential mind-f**ks in under two minutes. To recognize the show in WIRED style we present you with the full clip of The Event. It was incorporated generously into the promo videos for the show, but this is the whole terrifying scene. Behold, and make peace with your god.

Penny Dreadful — A Rare Connection

Poor Dorian Gray. All those years to playboy around and yet still so ill-equipped to deal with that most basic of human experiences: rejection! Anyone else think that hidden portrait of immortality looks a lot like Sad Keanu right about now? And yeah, he’s a spoiled brat lothario, but we feel for anyone being shot down Eva Green’s Vanessa Ives, who we are pretty sure is just a real psychic facet of Green that she must exercise through scripted drama, lest it rise up and supplant her consciousness entirely—like United States of Tara but much crazier and more sexually charged. Considering Sunday was the season finale of Penny Dreadful, we’ll be starting work on a paper chain countdown for Sin City: A Dame to Kill For like yesterday. After eight straight weeks of Eva reliably on our screens, Showtime can hardly expect us to go cold turkey. And as far as our psychosexual thriller fix goes, there’s always American Horror Story in the fall! Oh, TV gods, as you take with one hand, you give with the other.

Jimmy Kimmel Live! — Marc Maron on the Shocking Demise of his Childhood Idol

HBO can’t have all the week-in-TV glory, so consider this your second-act LuLz. If Louis C.K. is the Everyman’s hero comedian, Marc Maron is the Every Beleaguered Man’s counterpart. On Monday night he pulled up a couch next to Jimmy Kimmel to talk about, well, being Marc Maron, and gave us a little insight as to why he is the way he is. With childhood heroes like Captain Billy and a dad like that, the road map of Maron’s personality makes all too much sense.

Chelsea Lately — Melissa McCarthy’s Jet Ski Stunt Fail

“All I heard was ‘faster’ and ‘dig in.’” Melissa McCarthy is beyond likable, and even if we’re not super stoked on Tammy, aka The Underutilization of Melissa McCarthy’s Talents: Part Two, we will hand over our money as a general Thank You to her for being alive—especially after that real bad jet ski accident. Stunt doubles, Melissa! We can’t lose you!

Bonus Track: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver — Uganda and Pepe Julian Onziema Part 2

If you want to watch the conclusion of John Oliver’s interview with the phenomenally eloquent and engaging Pepe Julian Onziema, it was released as an online-only extra. And because we care, we’re giving it to you here.

Celebrate the 4th With These Truly Revolutionary Gadgets

Sholes and Glidden Remington No. 1 Type-Writer: Christopher Latham Sholes arranged the keys on this typewriter to prevent its underlying mechanics from getting stuck. The result was the first QWERTY keyboard. Today’s physical and touchscreen keyboards don't have the same internals, and yet we still use QWERTY. Illustration: Scientific American 6 (27). August 1872 via Wikipedia

Sholes and Glidden Remington No. 1 Type-Writer: Christopher Latham Sholes arranged the keys on this typewriter to prevent its underlying mechanics from getting stuck. The result was the first QWERTY keyboard. Today’s physical and touchscreen keyboards don't have the same internals, and yet we still use QWERTY. Illustration: Scientific American 6 (27). August 1872 via Wikipedia

Disposable Ballpoint Pen:The disposable ballpoint pen, first patented in 1884 but not manufactured until the 1940s, made the pen mobile. Photo: Roberto Fiadone/Wikimedia; Illustration: USPTO

Disposable Ballpoint Pen:The disposable ballpoint pen, first patented in 1884 but not manufactured until the 1940s, made the pen mobile. Photo: Roberto Fiadone/Wikimedia; Illustration: USPTO

Zenith Space Command: Not only was the Space Command the world’s first wireless remote control, it's also the reason why some people still call remotes "clickers." Instead of IR, the Space Command used ultrasound to change the channel and volume. An entirely new level of lazy was spawned and has been going strong ever since. Photo: Todd Ehlers via Wikipedia

Zenith Space Command: Not only was the Space Command the world’s first wireless remote control, it's also the reason why some people still call remotes "clickers." Instead of IR, the Space Command used ultrasound to change the channel and volume. An entirely new level of lazy was spawned and has been going strong ever since. Photo: Todd Ehlers via Wikipedia

Engelbart Mouse: Douglas Englebart created the first mouse in 1963 out of wood, and it tracked movement using two wheels on the bottom. Xerox PARC later honed the mouse and the GUI. Photo: Wikipedia

Engelbart Mouse: Douglas Englebart created the first mouse in 1963 out of wood, and it tracked movement using two wheels on the bottom. Xerox PARC later honed the mouse and the GUI. Photo: Wikipedia

Amana Radarange Microwave: When microwave ovens first started showing up in homes in the mid-1950s, they were big and expensive. This first countertop microwave oven cost less than $500 when it first became available in 1967, and by the mid-1970s, more than half of American homes had a microwave.

Amana Radarange Microwave: When microwave ovens first started showing up in homes in the mid-1950s, they were big and expensive. This first countertop microwave oven cost less than $500 when it first became available in 1967, and by the mid-1970s, more than half of American homes had a microwave.

Sony Trinitron KV-1310: Back when people bought CRT TVs and monitors, Sony's “Trinitron” lineup was worth paying extra for. The first Trinitron color TV, which was the first TV with an aperture-grille display and a single electron gun, first went on sale in the late 1960s. 25 years later, 100 million Trinitron sets had been sold. Photo: Sony

Sony Trinitron KV-1310: Back when people bought CRT TVs and monitors, Sony's “Trinitron” lineup was worth paying extra for. The first Trinitron color TV, which was the first TV with an aperture-grille display and a single electron gun, first went on sale in the late 1960s. 25 years later, 100 million Trinitron sets had been sold. Photo: Sony

Atari 2600 Video Computer System: While the original Nintendo sold about twice as many units as the Atari 2600 (62 million vs. 30 million), the Atari 2600 was the console that popularized the entire idea of home video-game consoles. Photo: Evan-Amos/Wikipedia

Atari 2600 Video Computer System: While the original Nintendo sold about twice as many units as the Atari 2600 (62 million vs. 30 million), the Atari 2600 was the console that popularized the entire idea of home video-game consoles. Photo: Evan-Amos/Wikipedia

Motorola StarTAC: Motorola started the cellphone game, and the flip-phone StarTAC was the first to start gaining mass acceptance following brick-like models such as the DynaTAC. Photo: Motorola

Motorola StarTAC: Motorola started the cellphone game, and the flip-phone StarTAC was the first to start gaining mass acceptance following brick-like models such as the DynaTAC. Photo: Motorola

Sony Walkman: The Sony Walkman made music portable for the first time, and made headphones a thing everyone owned.Image: Sony

Sony Walkman: The Sony Walkman made music portable for the first time, and made headphones a thing everyone owned.Image: Sony

Apple Macintosh 128K: The Mac (the Macintosh 128K) was the first affordable computer to incorporate a mouse and graphical user interface. Photo: Wikipedia

Apple Macintosh 128K: The Mac (the Macintosh 128K) was the first affordable computer to incorporate a mouse and graphical user interface. Photo: Wikipedia

Linksys Wireless Home Router: The wireless router brought the Internet into your home, instantaneously connecting you to the world. Or just to your friends on AIM. Photo: Jonathan Zander via Wikipedia

Linksys Wireless Home Router: The wireless router brought the Internet into your home, instantaneously connecting you to the world. Or just to your friends on AIM. Photo: Jonathan Zander via Wikipedia

IBM ThinkPad Laptop: IBM introduced its first ThinkPad laptop in 1992, and it was one of the first popular laptops to reach consumers. One of its defining qualities: An iconic red pointing stick embedded in the center of the keyboard negating the need for a mouse. Image: Lenovo

IBM ThinkPad Laptop: IBM introduced its first ThinkPad laptop in 1992, and it was one of the first popular laptops to reach consumers. One of its defining qualities: An iconic red pointing stick embedded in the center of the keyboard negating the need for a mouse. Image: Lenovo

Sony Handycam CCD-M8U: Before the first Handycam was released in the mid-1980s, video cameras were either beefy shoulder-mounted units or models that needed to be hooked up to a VCR to record. The boxy CCD-M8U was light and compact enough to fit in one hand, in part because it was built around smaller Video8 cassettes. Photo: Sony

Sony Handycam CCD-M8U: Before the first Handycam was released in the mid-1980s, video cameras were either beefy shoulder-mounted units or models that needed to be hooked up to a VCR to record. The boxy CCD-M8U was light and compact enough to fit in one hand, in part because it was built around smaller Video8 cassettes. Photo: Sony

Diamond Rio PMP300: The iPod was the first massively popular MP3 player, but it stood on the shoulders of the Diamond Rio PMP300, which had to beat an injunction from the RIAA just to get to market. That win opened the doors for the era of digital music, and took it from your desktop to the streets. Photo: Diamond Multimedia

Diamond Rio PMP300: The iPod was the first massively popular MP3 player, but it stood on the shoulders of the Diamond Rio PMP300, which had to beat an injunction from the RIAA just to get to market. That win opened the doors for the era of digital music, and took it from your desktop to the streets. Photo: Diamond Multimedia

Canon EOS Digital Rebel 300D: The first digital SLR that cost less than $1,000, Canon’s introductory Digital Rebel camera was a huge leap forward for digital photography. Sure, the six-megapixel, 7-point AF Digital Rebel may seem short on specs when compared to today’s $1000 DSLRs, but it was good enough to woo film shooters over to the digital side once and for all. Photo: Canon

Canon EOS Digital Rebel 300D: The first digital SLR that cost less than $1,000, Canon’s introductory Digital Rebel camera was a huge leap forward for digital photography. Sure, the six-megapixel, 7-point AF Digital Rebel may seem short on specs when compared to today’s $1000 DSLRs, but it was good enough to woo film shooters over to the digital side once and for all. Photo: Canon

Toyota Prius: With gas prices soaring along with environmental concerns, the Prius debuted in the early oughts, becoming the first popular hybrid electric vehicle in our history. Photo: Wikipedia

Toyota Prius: With gas prices soaring along with environmental concerns, the Prius debuted in the early oughts, becoming the first popular hybrid electric vehicle in our history. Photo: Wikipedia

Apple iPhone: Love Apple or hate it, the iPhone created the touchscreen smartphone space (and subsequent obsession) as we know it. Photo: Carl Berkeley/Flickr

Apple iPhone: Love Apple or hate it, the iPhone created the touchscreen smartphone space (and subsequent obsession) as we know it. Photo: Carl Berkeley/Flickr

These Amazing Firework Photos Were Made Without a Camera

Color Bang #45 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #45

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #50 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #50

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #1 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #1

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #29 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #29

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Big Bang #16 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Big Bang #16

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #60 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #60

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #41 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #41

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #65 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #65

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #30 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #30

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #51 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #51

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #61 Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Color Bang #61

Photo: Ross Sonnenberg

Strictly speaking, all you need to make a photo is light and a photo-sensitive medium. So why bother with the camera? Ross Sonnenberg doesn’t bother with such things with his Color Bang series, igniting fireworks directly on photo paper with dramatic results.

“Chance is a great part in the work but I use different materials to get different shapes and colors,” says Sonnenberg. “I started with black and white paper then moved on to color paper with which there is more possibilities.”

To make the Color Bang images, Sonnenberg closes his garage door and seals it from all light. lays out the paper face-up on the concrete and lights the fuse. Through trial and error, he has conjured some beautiful abstractions from the unassuming environment of his suburban home. The results remind him of constellations and galaxies.

At the mercy of volatile trajectories, Sonnenberg’s experiments with fireworks—which are illegal in his state—often result in images that don’t turn out. He’s had to move away from conventional processing.

“The color temperature of fireworks are so high I have to develop the work in trays and not send them through a processor which makes it even more difficult,” he says.

Inspired by the photograms of Marco Breuer, Susan Derges and Christopher Bucklow, creating Color Bang has been nothing but a massively fun exercise and—up until this point—one without injury.

“Knock on wood,” says Sonneneberg. “I’ve only had some small burns. I always have a bucket of water and a fire extinguisher nearby. I’ll never use Roman Candles again. If you stick them in a bucket of water when they are still lit, you get hit with exploding water.”

Sonnenberg says now his kids always want to do “art” with him. He keeps them away from the fireworks, however, and will continue to as he intends to ratchet up the explosions with larger pyrotechnics and more work space.

“I want to go bigger, but then everything has to get bigger,” he says.